Couples exchanging gifts on their wedding day: Yay or Nay

Couples exchanging gifts on their wedding day is definitely not new but since we’ve yet to really address it here on Triple B I wanted to do so today. Mr. TK and I didn’t participate in this but many couples do and look forward to it. I know some brides receive heartfelt cards, designer purses, jewelry and even shoes from their grooms who accept gifts like cufflinks and pocket watches from their brides. And the gift exchange — which usually involves a maid/matron of honor and best man — can make for awesome photo ops.

For Me?!

While I don’t regret that Mr. TK and I didn’t join in this phenomenon of exchanging gifts, I do like the idea of exchanging cards and/or letters the night before the ceremony or the morning of… It must be kinda nice to have handwritten notes to look back on and relive just what was going through the mind of one’s spouse in the days, minutes and even seconds leading up to I Do. On the other hand, it kinda seems like an added expense and/or stressor that isn’t necessary.

What say you? Did you and your beloved do this on your wedding day? Are you planning to do it for your nuptials? Sound off in the comments!

[Bottom photo courtesy of]

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  1. Avatar SpikesDtr says:

    I think it’s unnecessary but, I feel we live in a way too materialistic society. Your idea of a letter conveying pre-marital thoughts sounds precious.

  2. Avatar Leah M says:

    I also feel that it is an added expense that isn’t needed. My fiance and I won’t be exchanging gifts but we will be writing personal notes to each other. I look forward to hearing what is going on in his mind moments before we become husband and wife.

  3. I love the idea of writing handwritten notes or if you can’t come up with the words a card that conveys what you want to say is good too.

  4. Bridgette Bridgette says:

    Thanks for the feedback, folks. I thought I was trippin’ in thinking this was “a bit much” when I first learned of the practice. I would however really like to hear from someone who did or is planning to exchange gifts with their boo thang on their wedding day to get their rational behind it.

  5. Avatar Tiffany says:

    So..I got a card and a gift for my now-husband on our wedding day. I think he didn’t realize that he was *supposed* to do the same thing, and it didn’t bother me in the least, believe it or not! One of the gifts that I got were really focused on his interests (gaming) and it was meant to show him that I recognized and appreciated that side of him. The other was a beautiful, inexpensive pair of vintage cufflinks that made me think of him when I saw them. In the interest of full disclosure, he more than made up for not getting me a gift with the most epic birthday of my adult life three days after our wedding. (I’m not kidding.)

    In any case, I don’t think it’s a must-do, but I also don’t think it’s fair to dismiss it as something unnecessary or materialistic. It all depends on the couple, and the gifts don’t have to be elaborate or expensive–just from the heart. My two cents.

  6. Bridgette Bridgette says:

    Thanks for stopping by and commenting, Tiffany! I appreciate your detailed explanation which is reminiscent of (part of) my desire to gift my hubby with a groom’s cake at our wedding. For the record, I enjoy when there are varying — yet always respectful — opinions in the comments section of Triple B. If everyone always agreed, the comments section would lack rich dialogues we can all grow from and that is always my desire for this space.

  7. Avatar Carla A. Nelson says:

    I had not given this much thought. Glad to read the various comments above. I do like the notes, the only thing is I’m not sure if my fiancé would be willing to put his thoughts on paper, especially the day before or the day of our wedding; he’d be too nervous.

  8. I actually think it’s sweet to exchange a token during the wedding prep. A friend had me deliver the gift to her groom and I had the joy of seeing his ‘softer’ side for the first time in that moment (I couldn’t wait to tell her of his reaction). I’ve never been a proponent of gifts for their own sake and don’t see the point of a purse or pocket watch unless they’re heirlooms or particularly meaningful beyond their extravagance. I imagine that this gift exchange can serve as a reminder of why everyone is assembled-two people are in love and want to commit to each other. With all of the hustle and bustle in the bridal suite and the rumored cold feet in the groom’s room, a loving letter or gift can re-focus hearts and minds on the love.

  9. Avatar S.Bouie says:

    We are doing this and I can’t wait!!!

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