Part II in our special series: I Love My Wife Even More, Because of the Mother She Is was penned by Richard who currently resides in Florida. Richard, who has known his wife for 10 years and has been married for six, opens up on how they’ve grown individually and collectively over the past decade. Be sure to comment on his essay shared below.
They say that you never really know how you’ll hold up in a situation such as having kids until you’re thrust into it. My wife and I first became acquainted with each other in 2005. We lost touch and reconnected in 2007. By 2009 we were first time parents. We had more time than some to get to know the other, but not as much as some would suggest. Date nights and weekend getaways were not part of our courtship; we didn’t try on living with other to see what it was like. It wasn’t until we were placed into our rapidly moving life that we truly got to learn about the other; and our we, became us.
I stood next to my wife in the delivery room and watched her do something I could never do. The videos, the courses, the doctor visits could never fully prepare you for that moment. I had the luxury of being able to stand there and reflect on my life. My responsibility was to stand by, take a picture or video, keep quiet and out of her way. She did the heavy lifting, natural and drug-free she brought our son into the world. I saw a level or courage and strength that I knew on a human level she was capable of, but you never really understand until you’re in the position. In the months following our son’s birth, she would return to school, embark on a new career path and come into her own as a mother. There have been challenges, there will always be, but I continue to see her rise to the occasion time and again.
We discussed having more children; the logistics and timing. I move with my brain more often because while following my heart has had it’s rewards it’s also brought hurt. She moves with a faith that is beyond my comprehension at times. Even the prism of faith, I approach with a cerebral brush. A few short weeks before graduation she found out that we would be parents again. While it was something she wanted, my concerns about finances and time crept into her joy. At that point my concerns were for her and all that she worked for in that time as a student and her taking the time to flourish in her career choice.
We’ve both sacrificed, compromised, and given for the other and the children, the difference is this was what I was hoping for at this stage of my life. I often feel as if we’re something that happened to her. And for whatever reason maybe faith or following her heart she has shown uncommon strength for her years and that continues to impress and amaze me. At her age I was still running trying to find myself and here she is helping, quite successfully I may add, raise two children. I guess you never know what you’re truly capable of until you’re in the situation, and for that I love my wife more because of the mother she is.
What was your biggest takeaway from Richard’s essay?
Read more from men on marriage here!