Did you forget that Marriage Matters Mondays has been replaced with a Cousin Mars special series: I Love My Wife Even More, Because of the Mother She Is during May? Of course you didn’t. Our third husband to participate, Donald (currently residing in TX) is a proud father of two and has been married for 10 years. I’m sure you’ll enjoy what he shared below.

I pride myself in being myself. What I mean is that I am happy with who I am, the good, the bad, and the ugly. I’m confident in my decisions and comfortable with the consequences. That being said, I love my wife most for the mother she is because if it weren’t for her, we probably wouldn’t be parents today. When our marriage began, I was focused on all of the tangibles of our union, a house, cars, and most important-building wealth!

After we were married, we balanced four jobs between the two of us for a few years to drive the cars we desired, get us into our dream home and become landlords. Once those goals were accomplished it was on to purchasing another investment property, and another, and another. In my mind, we were building an empire for our children (the children we didn’t have). The plan was working flawlessly.

When people would ask us, “When are you going to have children?” we would look right at each other and reply in unison as if rehearsed, “Not right now, maybe in a few years.” I believed that wholeheartedly, I wanted kids, just not right now.  After we create something great for them where we can afford to give them everything they could desire. I just needed to wait until we made it!  We would often get those generic responses, “All you need is love.” or “Once you have kids you will find a way.”  Whatever!

One day, a coworker asked me in front of my wife when we were having children and we again replied in unison except this time while I gave the usual response, she replied with “Whenever he’s ready.” Later we discussed the miscommunication and she explained that she (we) were ready. The next relevant memory I have was her showing me the stick and saying she’s pregnant and I responded with ‘that’s what’s up’ to avoid exploding.

The moment I first saw my daughter, Daphne, I instantly loved her while simultaneously falling in love deeper with my wife for insisting that we bring this moment to fruition… I love my wife more for the mother that she is because without her, I would have waited forever to have children and they are the best part of my life. Thank you, Dana.

What was your biggest takeaway from Donald’s essay?

Read more from men on marriage here!