A significant portion of my life for the last few weeks has been dedicated to wedding invitations. My Save the Date was a hit so the pressure is now on for the invite(s). It can be overwhelming for even the biggest stationery fan. Below are a few tips and tricks that are helping me sort through the paper maze.
PAPER CHASER The printing method you select will make a huge impact on the look and cost of your ultimate invitations. Here’s the lingo you need to know before making your final decisions:
Engraved This is one of the oldest and priciest printing methods. A metal plate is created and pressed onto paper leaving a raised or “bruised” design. This style is most common for uber-formal nuptials. Visit Smythson of Bond Street for examples of engraved suites.
Letterpress Instead of a raised design like the one described above, a letterpress plate leaves a deep impression in the paper.
Thermography Ideal for those who like the look of raised lettering but would rather pass on the engraved price tag. This heat-based process can fool even an seasoned stationery geek.
Flat Printing A general term for smooth to the touch invites. It includes offset and digital printing and is most common for modern couples because of the versatility and affordability it offers.
Your wedding invitation suite shopping list: It is an added plus when everything from your save-the-date to the thank you card is cohesive in design. These are the paper items you’ll likely need leading up to and on the big day. Don’t feel obligated to purchase everything on this list (I’m certainly not.) but rather pick and choose what works best for your style and budget.
- save the date
- invitation
- rsvp response card
- directions card and/or info summarizing other wedding weekend events (i.e. – rehearsal dinner or farewell brunch)
- table number and escort cards
- ceremony program
- menu card
- thank you card
WEDDING INVITATION DO’S & DON’TS
DO buy an extra 25 envelopes just in case you make mistakes when addressing them.
DO ask your local post office to weigh a complete invitation before mailing. You’ll need to know exactly how much postage is needed for each envelope — don’t assume one stamp is sufficient.
DON’T forget to triple-check your invitation proof. Enlist the help of a grammar-savvy loved one (not your fiance/fiancee) to assist.
DON’T forget to confirm your guests’ legal names and the names of their dates if applicable before addressing envelopes.
Triple B Sidebar: Entire books have been written about the proper way to address wedding invitations. Apparently some people get their panties in a bunch when they aren’t “properly” addressed with their professional titles — Mr. & Mrs. John Doe versus Dr. John Doe & The Honorable Jane Doe. Maybe I’m anti-establishment but I think this is a waste of time and energy. Would I feel differently if I had a bunch of letters in front of or behind my name? Perhaps. But my fiance and I have tried to keep this process as easy-breezy as possible. Use your discernment. You know your guests better than any experts do.
[Photo courtesy of Bibi.]
I needed a distraction in order to keep my sanity. Sooo glad Triple B exist. A refreshing take on love, but more important – a refreshing view of black positivity. To be honest, I wouldn’t be upset if I never learned another thing about stationary. However, taming my recent frustration was assisted by reading something that I had very little knowledge of. By no means am I suggesting forgetting the obvious or what is important, but I am saying a calculated effort to spark change (for me) can’t occur while I’m so frustrated that I miss the forest for the tree.
Triple B I have a question, if I’m addressing an invitation where both the husband and wife are doctors, do I address it as Dr. John and Dr. Mary Doe? Thanks
@Anonymous: Speaking as a lady physician, I recommend that you ask her how she likes to be addressed. I know it’s one more thing to do but, some like “The Doctors Doe”, some “Doctor John Doe & Doctor Mary Doe” and others may like “Doctor & Doctor Doe”.
Hopefully, there’s no ‘wrong’ way to invite them to this wonderful occasion!
What do you think, B?
Thank you so much Ronda, it was so kind of you to help an old lady out because I really didn’t know. You see I’m throwing a separate reception for my daughter when she get married.
I hope that this event brings even more joy into your circle of family & friends and that your efforts are appreciated.
I’m sure that Bridgette & other readers have suggestions, too.
I just went to Vistaprint…There are so many details to stay on top off that I couldn’t add all of this to the mix…but pardon me, I’m just a stressed out bride-to-be…LOL
Thanks for weighing in, everyone. @Anon, below is a snippet of guidelines I borrowed from a trusted online resource about how to traditionally address wedding invites. There’s an asterisk next to the answer to your question about a set of married doctors…
A married couple: Mr. and Mrs. Carl Fallow
A married couple in which the woman has kept her name Ms. Janice Collins and Mr. Kevin Black
A widow Mrs. Carl Fallow
A divorced woman Ms. Sally Fallow (or her maiden name if she’s reclaimed it).
* Married doctors The Doctors Stevenson, Dr. Carmen Stevenson and Dr. Andrew Stevenson, Drs. Carmen and Andrew Stevenson.
Husband is a doctor Dr. and Mrs. Andrew Stevenson, Dr. Andrew Stevenson and Ms. Carmen Gomez.
Wife is a doctor Dr. Carmen Stevenson and Mr. Andrew Stevenson
Teenage girl Miss Gloria Johnson
Teenage boy (under 18) Christopher Jones
Judge, Governor, Mayor,
United States Senator,
Member of Congress,
Cabinet Members,
Ambassadors
The Honorable
Husband is a colonel Colonel and Mrs. Michael Jones
Husband is a major Major and Mrs. Lawrence Tanaka
Husband is a lieutenant Lieutenant and Mrs. John Warren
Wife is a captain Captain Alicia Huang and Mr. Albert Huang
I cannot stress enough how important it is for every couple to use their own discernment in these matters. This type of stuff is a big deal to some people and not important in the least to others. Pick and choose what etiquette you want to adhere to based on your needs/wants. For example, traditionally it is considered a big “no-no” to indicate that a reception is adult-only on a wedding invitation. The way an invitation is addressed is supposed to dictate who is invited and if there is still doubt immediate family and the couple’s bridal party are supposed to spread the word about the wedding being adult-only. Mr. TK and I didn’t want to take that chance. Sue us. On the other hand, there are other traditions that we did follow because they made sense to us.
Howdy! Do you use Twitter? I’d like to follow you if that would be okay.
I’m undoubtedly enjoying your blog and look forward to new updates.