Marriage is a contract to some people, a commitment to others and most unfortunately, slavery to a few. For me, it’s two people who love each other coming together for the advancement of their common goals. My wife and I love each other and our common goals are to prosper in life, raise kids, and not grow old alone. We decided to get married to accomplish those goals because we are aware we couldn’t be as successful at any of them without each other.
Shout out to all the single parents raising their children on their own, but I wanted help! I wanted to raise mine with someone I trusted, had similar ideologies to my own and beautiful enough that I wouldn’t mind seeing their face on my kids. The goal of this partnership is to achieve what can’t be done alone. I make my wife a better person as she does me. We fill each others holes, as our whole is greater than the sum of our parts. By sharing in the game of life we are able to offer more. Resources, ideas, and effort are all doubled.
Love is a big part of marriage. Love is when you are willing to put someone else’s needs before your own. As parents, as business partners, and even as lovers, this commitment doesn’t work if both parties aren’t willing to do that. It would be like having a 50/50 partner in a business, but never letting them have input in the company’s direction. If we are not on the same page with something, it’s easier to resolve because I love her and want her happiness. She loves me and wants mine. As a result, we often fall somewhere in the middle making compromise easier.
Our marriage makes us better people. We are stronger and more committed in life. Our weaknesses are lessened and our strengths multiplied when we are together. The common definition of marriage is ‘the legal union of a couple as partners in a relationship.’ That’s great, but I find the more basic definition of marriage more appropriately defines our union, ‘the combination or mixture of two or more elements.’ That’s what we are…
What do you think of Donald’s essay? Share your thoughts in the comments.
Revisit our previous essay in the What Marriage Means to Me series here.
Learn more about Donald and his wife Dana here.
So proud of this guy! Donald, all the best to you and Dana — I can’t believe it is almost 10 years since MIA… Thank you for opening up (again) about love, marriage + parenthood on Triple B.
Great read! I love hearing from men on this site. Thank you Donald and Mars.
And just to offer another pov, many single parents did not choose to “do it alone” initially but circumstances made it so. Also, an unmarried parent isn’t necessarily a single parent in the traditional sense. I know dozens of people who have seemingly mastered co-parenting without being legally married. Not to mention the unmarried mothers and fathers who have a village of uber-supportive grandparents, godparents, aunts, uncles, etc. that actively assist them in parenting.
I personally hope to raise a child/ren with my husband one day but I had to add this perspective as well.
Donald’s sentiments are expressed with excellence. So beautifully, I imagined music accompanying the fine lyrics. Thanks for sharing.
Wow! Almost ten years and two kids later, I am still in black bridal bliss…
Such a beautiful and inspiring essaty…..
I appreciate Donald sharing his story. Knowing he and his lovely wife, I can attest that he not only talks it, but walks the walk also. As a man, it is great to witness other men in a positive husband role that genuinely appear to enjoy marriage.